Running

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I don't like running. Not right now at least. I've never been a [good] runner. I always blamed it on being a dancer and having "different" muscles and not playing sports. But now that I am in my mid-twenties (ummm when did that happen?!) and I am trying to create habits and routines that should have been established long ago, I am struggling. 

I'm sitting here after running a mere 2.23 miles. Each step of those miles my body ached and pleaded for me to cease. And I began to hear lies in my head... "You are too out of shape to run." "You are too slow." "Every car that drives by you is judging how bad of a runner you are." "Just give up, there is no hope for you." I will be honest; many times I believe those lies. I buy into them. I give in to what Satan is telling me to knock me down and to keep me low. But in the midst of my (literal) pain, I prayed. And I prayed hard. I wasn't going to get further than 1/4 a mile without praying. My ear-buds weren't staying in and my shins were screaming with pain. Frustration was taking over. I continued to pray. I had to stop and walk often. I pushed through. I came up against a hill. I made myself run up it.  By the grace of God, I finished my 2.23 mile run in one piece. He helped keep my mind clear and motivated. It took me 14.5 minutes to run each mile, but I didn't give up. Even though I want to run a faster mile and I want to enjoy running I have to remind myself that at least I got my hinney off the couch and did something active. I'm a little embarrassed to even publish how slow of a runner I am, but hey...I ran instead of being a vegetable and watching tv. I have to continually remind myself that it doesn't matter if I'm slow now. I'm working on it and I will improve. Things that are worth attaining require hard work and are typically challenging. Running isn't my favorite thing. I don't know if it ever will be easy for me. But I know that when I actually train and keep a consistent running schedule, it is definitely easier than when I take a long hiatus. On Sunday I am running my fourth 5k. I've walked more races, but this is the fourth race that I have (semi) trained for and tried to run the majority of it. I didn't start training in enough time to be good and ready. But I'm going to run it anyway. I will pray and push through! And I am even excited to do it, despite my rough training sessions. And I am grateful for a sweet friend that I can share these struggles with, and who encourages me to keep pounding the pavement. I have to remind myself that there is nothing like pushing myself and crossing the finish line, then being rewarded with a medal. (Not to mention the self gratification of completing the race!) So, the point of this post is to remind myself in a few months where I started (again) with running. That even though it is hard, I CAN DO IT! God will provide a way. I will be a better runner. I will stick with it. I will pray through it. And maybe, just maybe, there is someone out there reading this that is also struggling with lies that Satan is telling you about getting fit and being healthy. Don't listen to those lies. You can do it. It will be hard and you may have some set backs and bad days, but the glorious thing is that tomorrow is a new day. Push through it and pray through it. We all have different journeys and demons we battle, but there is ONE God who hears our cries and wants to help us overcome those struggles. 

I had a couple other posts that need to be written, but this was on my heart. Sometimes you just need to get something off your chest to be able to carry on. Now...off to ice my sore muscles! ;)